I was overwhelmed at the amount of artistic landfill stuffed into Stephen's House. Every available molecule in his home was crammed with so many intriguing trinkets and assorted moldy dead things, there was no place to sit down. Interestingly, there's no bread (or food for that matter) in his kitchen, but there's about 150 antique toasters....and it's unclear if any of them actually work. Once you get over the fact he's got a stuffed two-headed calf in his living room, you'll soon make your way to his bedroom. This is where he showcases the deformed fetuses floating in jars of formaldahyde artfully displayed near his bed. I asked eligible bachelor Stephen what the ladies thought of this particular choice of decor, and he is quite confident the woman for him will be fine with it. I left the 3 hour tour of Stephen's house completely discombobulated, sneezing, awed and inspired, but unsure of what I would paint for the upcoming show. Since he already has everything under the sun crammed into that house, I figured I would create objects that WEREN'T there. Stephen does not own a Macedonian Mobile Soap Dish, but he sure wishes he did.
Stephen does not own a Tricky Little Imp Toothbrush Holder like this either. When I asked if he wanted one, he was visibly shaken. "No, no" he said, "that's not the kind of thing I'd be comfortable having in my bathroom."
On the other hand I would be delighted with a Tricky Little Imp Toothbrush holder!
Posted by: Cyclops Kitten Natividad | July 05, 2006 at 08:28 AM
From your description, I cannot imagine Stephen being "uncomfortable" with anything!
Posted by: Miss Cellania | July 05, 2006 at 11:23 AM
Oh, he is, he is. He's got a house full of boobalicious babes, in paintings, sculpture, engravings and photos...but there aren't a lot of big ole weiners to be seen. He's so darn het.
Posted by: Cyclops Kitten Natividad | July 05, 2006 at 04:01 PM
Art historians take note: This is a good place to discuss the role of symbolism in art, especially in regard to the Tricky Little Imp toothbrush holder. Look at it closely. What do you see? Exactly! After looking at this grinning sprite and his prodigious toothbrush you may feel your own dental tool is woefully inadequate. Actually, your own brush may be the same size (or even larger!) than the imp's but because he is so small, his brush looks huge.
Posted by: Bob | July 05, 2006 at 04:44 PM
I thought size was determined by the shoe size. Boy, was I wrong!
Where can I find me a Macedonian Mobile Soap Dish?
Posted by: Beans | July 08, 2006 at 02:24 PM
I love Stephen's house! Is it somehow weird of me (who rarely engages in this sort of behavior myself) to wonder how in the world he dusts all this stuff? I don't know about the Tricky Imp, though. I don't know if I could start every day with a serious feeling of inadequacy invading the morning ablutions. :)
Posted by: idj | July 11, 2006 at 06:06 AM
I'm not so sure he spends a lot of time dusting. If you have dust, fur, or feather allergies the going can be a bit rough...and it's not weird at all, pretty much the reaction of everyone who goes in there (after HOLY CRAP!) is, how do you clean this?
Posted by: Cyclops Kitten Natividad | July 11, 2006 at 05:49 PM